Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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