he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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