Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Can you bring me the toilet please
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
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