Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
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