Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize