Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize