He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
Randomize
