Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
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