And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
then he tried to convert me to islam
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
THEN YOU WILL NOT GET TO SEE MY TITS TONIGHT OR IN THE NEAR FUTURE YOU HEARTLESS BASTARD
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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