I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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