i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
