I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm serious-it was like trying to deep-throat a minivan.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize