seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
We saw the mini basketball hoop and unicycle and just knew we had to create a new sport
Drunk minds think alike
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