do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Randomize