I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
