R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
We are two peas in an std pod
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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