I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
two words: eviction party
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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