So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
Randomize
