I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
Randomize
