So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
