omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
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