im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
The CEO is on this whole 'what do you do with your spare time?' kick. Umm... get drunk and have sex in bar parking lots.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
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