so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Randomize
