You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
