So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
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If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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