So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
She makes me want to have breakfast margaritas every day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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