do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
This is awkward. You have a four minute voicemail from me. I would delete it. I accidently hit your number on speed dial and called you while I was vomiting a mai tai.
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
