I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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