Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
I will be naked everywhere
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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