i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
Randomize
