Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
So were driving two hours to go to a club and Charles packed me a sippy cup full of tequila. He thinks of everything!
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