the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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