If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
We just finished having sex and as soon as we get out of bed he yells "trust fall" and runs me over
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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