you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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