I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i finished masturbating and realized my blackberry had accidentaly called my grandmother in my pocket during it. awkward...
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
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