So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I managed to convince him it was his fault I cheated on him...he spent the last 40 minutes going down on me. I feel legendary.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
