It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
