We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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