Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize
