ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
The one time I decide to bring people over you are laying naked on the coffee table watching the ceiling fan cause "it just moves so fast" I'm guessing you got paid today??
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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