She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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