So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize