The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize
