i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
My sister and her gf showed up at my door with no pants on at 4 AM talking claiming its hot.
Randomize
