i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Today's forecast: A sex tornado warning has been issued in your area. Counties affected include your bed, your shower, or your couch. This warning is in effect until further notice. Signs of a sex tornado include: your girlfriend coming up with a huge analogy to inform you that she's ungodly horny today.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
