It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
Don't use the things I tell you while drunk after the bruins won the cup against me
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
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