Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
Randomize
