and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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