hell yes lets make some ravioli
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
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