If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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